I’m pretty open about the fact that I am a therapist that is currently in therapy. I recognize that this is a form of self-disclosure that some people eat up and others are repelled by. Why do I still share this information? I believe in the importance of destigmatizing mental health and its treatment. I believe that we all deserve healthier minds, healthier bodies, and happier lives, and that we’re not going to get there by being silent about our truths. I believe that psychotherapy is one of the ways that we can achieve these ends.
I’m not going to get into the specifics of my story or my struggles. Therapy is a confidential space, with clear boundaries, so I am asserting here that I would like to keep those details between me and her. That being said though, I am willing to share what therapy feels like for me. I’m going to explain and demonstrate that I am a human being, which means that I struggle because we all do.
Many of us grew up in a world that taught us that our emotions are a nuisance. We were taught that being cold and stoic was a strength. I used to believe that too. I don’t anymore. I now know that feeling and expressing your emotions is a sign of strength. I believe that we all have a story to tell, a weight that we carry around day in and day out, which shapes how we see the world. Sometimes our early life experiences cloud reality. Sometimes our emotions shape our sense of what is true. I’m certain that you’ve experienced a time when the feelings in your body took over. Where the anger or the sadness or the frustration just couldn’t be contained anymore. Where you weren’t really open to suggestions because you were angry and that was the truth of the matter. I know that you’ve experienced that because we all do. Humans are much more similar than many of us like to admit, which is why I know how important it is that we receive support. Seeing a therapist isn’t a weakness. It’s an acknowledgment of your humanness – the fact that sometimes you struggle and sometimes you need help.
When a client comes to me, they are almost always nervous. They walk in the door (or log onto our teletherapy call) with butterflies in their stomachs and doubts in their mind. This is normal. I expect this because they are walking in my door admitting their innate humanness. They are scared and they do it anyway. This is true bravery.
If you are getting ready to go see your therapist, maybe for the first time, maybe for the 50th time, you may be nervous. Maybe you’re nervous about what you will talk about. Or how they’ll react. Or what your mother/father/brother/friend/etc. would say about you being here. Talk to your therapist about this. Push yourself to continue being vulnerable because that is the only way through. Our society has taught us that we need to look, feel, and act a certain way to be acceptable. Everything else is deleted, downvoted, or hidden. This causes and perpetuates shame. Vulnerability is the antidote to shame. So be brave. Tell your story. The whole honest story. Because this is how we get to healthier minds, healthier bodies, and happier lives. You deserve it. You can have it. It’s gonna take some work. But you can do hard things. If you’d like, I can help you with that.
So in sum, this is why I’m a therapist that is open about the fact that she is in therapy. Because I know how scary it can be to be vulnerable, to ask for help, and to receive it. Because I believe that we all deserve the loving compassion that a therapist can provide. Yes, even you.
